most girls: hair done up really cute, lots of makeup, designer clothes, hipster blog, thigh gap
me: no hair, glasses, scary beard, button up shirts and porkpie hat, cooks meth to provide for my family. i am the danger. i am the one who knocks
Haha shit nerd train get fucked up
Penis jokes away
Baked some iPhone cookies to trick cops into pulling me over, then I just take a bite and ask if cookies are against the law.
this is the dumbest fucking thing i have ever seen